love your enemies

"if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.

in doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." romans 12:20

the past two years have been particularly rough on me and my relationships with other women. i have opened myself up too much to too many women and they turned around and judged me, criticized my motherhood, and belittled me down to almost nothing. but through all of these hardships, i have been able to realize what is important in life. my faith, my husband, my son and my family. that is all.

relationships are tough. the older i get the more i know that it is more important to have a few true friends, than many fake ones. the military is notorious for meeting a lot of people many times throughout the year - and sometimes we relate to them because we are going through similar stories like deployments and detachments. but, be careful who you open yourself up to.... people make take what you have shown or told them and spread gossip to others while judging you and twisting things around. all of the "she said, he said" is so juvenile and it is so tiring time after time.

i have chosen to cut the toxic out of my life and move on with what is important to me. friends come and go, but family is forever.

Still I Rise by Maya Angelou

Still I Rise

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops.
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.

ours

"don't worry your pretty little mind,

people throw rocks at things that shine"

seems like people enjoy watching others be miserable... well not this time. i refuse to let what others say, bother me. it is a hard thing to do, but i honestly don't have time to care. i am too busy spending time time with people that i love and nurturing my few friendships as well as spending time with my son and husband. life is too short to be anything but happy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OniajbXAJXE

my son

every night when we say good night, i tell my son that i love him to the moon and back.... he says the same.

i have been spending a lot of time alone with kyler. i am fascinated by his hunger for knowledge and how well he picks up things. seeing him light up for the first time when he sees a giraffe or learns a new letter on his own makes all the struggles worth it.

we say our prayers every night after his bath. there is nothing better than the smell of a child straight out of the bath and in clean pajamas waiting to be tucked in for the night. he enjoys reading me his books each night and i miss him while he is asleep. i am thankful to God every day that he blessed me to by kyler's mother. it is like no joy i have ever experienced and what they say about your heart walking outside of your body in the form of a little boy is so true. and you won't understand until you have a child of your own.

kyler is the best thing to ever happen to me and i need to remind myself that each and everyday because if i blink for just one second he will be 18.....

my family

I had the pleasure of my family visiting me in California two weeks ago and it was so much fun. We did all the sight seeing touristy stuff and I showed them the best parts of San Diego. We had a great time and it just made me miss them even more.




The girls at Corvette Diner! We had a blast.

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grace.

"feed your faith, and your fears will starve to death."

i have had to be reminded of this lately.... with all of the trouble that exists in this world, the only true and constant is God's grace. for without it, there would be no hope.

i am truly grateful for my family, my close and few friends, my son, my husband and his courage to do what he does, and grace.

valentines day

another valentines day without my husband, but we celebrated it before he left for the detachment by going to dinner at the lighthouse. we found the restaurant when we were taking mom, dad, joe & claire. matt found out they have a sunday brunch with bottomless mimosas! sounds like my kind of brunch! ;)

kyler and I spent the whole day hanging with Tera. we cleaned her place and had a lot of girl talk -- It was just the thing I needed to get my mind off of things that have been happening lately.




My Morning Valentine. It's my
Favorite way to wake up each day. I love this kid so much.

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inner peace

quotes i like

"never blame anyone in your life.

good people give you happiness

bad people give you experience

worst people give you lessons

and best people give you memories."